Listen! It will only protect you....

The other day, I was flicking through what to watch on our computer. We don't have a T.V. and rely on iplayer / 4OD etc for anything that we do watch.  What this means is we have to make a choice about what we watch rather than just allowing the programmes to roll on and decide for us (this is what we found when we did have a T.V). So along the top banner of 4OD scrolls all of the most recent things that have been on for you to choose to watch easily. I noticed a documentary about about a subject that made me curious. I will not tell you what the programme was as I think it will only distract you from the point of this blog. When I saw the advert for it, I thought 'that's something I'd be interested in watching' and a little voice said "but it probably wouldn't be a very good idea would it?".  In the end, we watched what we were planning on watching - a programme about families with lots of children.

The next day, I was having a pyjama day. The kids were playing and I thought again about watching the documentary I had seen advertised the night before. Again there was a voice clearly telling me "that still wouldn't be a good idea". But I decided to start watching it anyway. Why? Because I am not a robot, I can make my own decisions, and sometimes they can be bad ones. So I sat on my bed and found it on my phone. But after a few minutes it cut out. So I pressed play again. Whilst it was buffering, that voice started speaking again: "I am trying my best to make this difficult for you to watch, but it really is up to you".  Here I have to admit, I was stupid again. I refreshed the screen and continued to watch for a further 10 mins (twice being interrupted by a small child calling me and loosing wi - fi connection again) until there was an advert break. Thank God for the advert break - literally. I turned it off. I got up.  I removed myself from the situation and went to play with my kids, thanking God that he really does love me.

I am an incredibly visual person. I can see images in my head clearly even if I have only seen the original image for a brief moment.  This can be a good thing and also a bad thing - depending on what the image is of.  Unfortunately, the world wants us to think that sexual images are a normal and healthy part of life and that although censorship exists, once an adult, it really doesn't matter what we see within the media. This is absolutely not true - and I will tell you why. The documentary that I was starting to watch contained some sexual images and even in the 15 minutes that I saw, they were able to get into my brain and pollute me. This idea goes against nearly every message our culture sends us. From perfume adverts to shop windows, sex is all around us, in our faces - whether we like it or not. Somehow, in all of this, we are expected to be able to raise men and women who have a respect and understanding of how they should treat and be treated by the opposite sex.

The God of the bible however, is a counter culture God. His son Jesus spent most of his life upsetting those people around him who were so consumed by culture they were unable to see the truth that would set them free. The voice telling me that watching the programme would be a bad idea was not some controlling God who wants to sit on His throne and stop people from having fun. He is in fact a Loving God who wants to see people safe and whole and protected from crap that tries to get in. He is the God who invented sex! He is the God who says to me:

"Hannah I love you. I don't want you to get images in your head that you will find hard to get rid of. I want your love life to get better and better the longer you have been married! Not how the world tells you - that it will get boring and eyes will wander! I don't want these images to get in the way of intimacy with your husband. I want this time to be amazing for you and your husband. I want you to only have eyes for each other! I whisper to you so you can know that I want the best for you - in EVERY situation."

I am not a robot. I can make my own choices - and it's easy to think that when you know something you learn and don't make the same mistake again. But I am human and God gives me grace! God wants to set us free from stuff that gets in the way of us being the most 'us' we can be. We weren't born to be some clone of society who ticks all of cultures boxes. Instead, a uniquely designed precious individual, that has never existed and never will exist again. With a loving God who has our back, who through relationship wants to see us more free than ever before. If we listen to Him, how therefore can we fail?!